


finish this waste of a life (nothing kills a man faster than his own head)

by blurryvessels



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Depression, Gen, Sad, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Unhappy Ending, im sorry, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 07:24:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9710960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blurryvessels/pseuds/blurryvessels
Summary: tyler just wants everyone to leave him alone.





	

**Author's Note:**

> vent-fic because i've had the worst fucking night. i'm sorry.  
> tw; self-harm, depression, and suicide

Sometimes Tyler Joseph is happy he is alive.  
Sometimes he's glad to wake up in the morning.  
Sometimes he doesn't want to just crawl out of his skin and leave.

Today is not one of those days.

Tyler thinks he is weak. He thinks he is weak for not cutting deep enough, for not drawing enough blood, for not shoving the entire bottle of pills waiting on his dresser down his throat because Tyler is **weak**.

He hates himself for it.

Tyler isn't going to go to school today. He doesn't care that his best friend Joshua Dun will be worried about him all day. He doesn't care that the pile of assignments he needs to make up will grow and grow because it won't matter once he kills himself. But Tyler can't kill himself now because he is **weak**.

_Tyler wants to die today. He wanted to die yesterday. He will want to die tomorrow. So why doesn't he just fucking kill himself already?_

Tyler tells his mom he isn't feeling well and thinks he should stay home. She believes him; Tyler never lies to her. (Well, he does, she just doesn't find out.) His parents eventually leave for work and his siblings leave for school.

Tyler gets up and goes to the bathroom. He takes out the blade he hides in his private drawer under the sink and wastes no time in pressing it against his skin and dragging it as hard as he can across his scarred wrist. It starts bleeding immediately and Tyler goes into a trance, slicing his skin open as his head fills with thoughts.

_Tyler cuts more violently than ever because he deserves it. He deserves to feel endless pain because he is so fucking weak and worthless and literally no one fucking cares about him. Tyler is not Joshua Dun. Joshua Dun is always happy and his family loves him and he has lots of friends. He wouldn't be affected in the slightest if Tyler left. Tyler Joseph, on the other hand, is always sad and his family doesn't give a shit about him and Joshua Dun is his only friend. He has nothing left for him here._

Suddenly Tyler is falling backwards and hitting his head on the wall behind him. His vision is going dark and his arm is burning so fucking badly but he doesn't care. He embraces the pain and forces himself to feel every last bit of it because Tyler Joseph is done being weak. His skin feels too tight and his eyes are clouding and he wants nothing more than to just be _fucking gone_.

_Tyler is stupid and weak and worthless and a coward because he should have killed himself months ago but he was too fucking scared. He wants to just jump into the lake near his house and never come back up. He wants to "accidentally" take too many antidepressants and fall asleep and never wake up. Tyler wants to fucking leave and no one fucking cares._

Tyler blinks and suddenly Josh is in front of him, pulling out his phone. Tyler thinks he is yelling into it but he doesn't know for sure because his hearing is muffled and he feels like he's underwater. Josh is crying, shaking him, begging him to say something and he knows that Tyler is about to die.

But Tyler was gone years ago. He left Josh to fight his demons alone because Tyler was weak and selfish and a coward. Josh has been laying at the bottom of the lake for a while now, and all he can see is Tyler in front of him on the bathroom floor bleeding out. Josh hasn't been able to get that image out of his head since it happened two years ago. Josh sucks in a breath, but instead of oxygen, he is greeted with water. It rushes into his lungs and his chest feels like it's going to explode but Josh doesn't care. He'll get to see Tyler again.

Josh doesn't have to be afraid anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> wow my first fic is depressing as shit! go figure! lmao i hope you enjoyed ig? this sucked but its 1am and i want to die so this is the best i could do. sorry it moved really fast lmao but yeah idk what im saying anymore


End file.
